Well, I guess there's no more denying it. I'm home from Guatemala. Technically I've been back almost a week, but not in my heart. For some people, the adjustment back home is pretty smooth. For others it's not as smooth but they quickly adjust. And then there are those like me. We are "those" people. The people who are thankful to be home but grieve not being in Guatemala. I expected it so I prepared myself. I took many steps to insure my grief would not injure or harm anyone else.
Step 1: Make sure to have plenty of Nutella.
Step 2: Make sure to have the jar of Nutella open and close by when looking at pictures from Guatemala.
Step 3: NO TRIPS TO WALMART FOR AT LEAST A WEEK (unless you are out of Nutella, but don't make eye contact with anyone)
Step 4: Make sure to have Nutella in your mouth if you watch any videos of Guatemala.
Step 5: Warn any visitors that you may still be in your pajamas at 3:00 in the afternoon eating Nutella. (Don't judge)
Step 6: Be open to any other steps that could help you get through the first week (like Costco pizza, great friends, sisters, and fries with gravy and cheese. Again, don't judge me.)
I also like to play the Guatemala backwards game. "This time last week I was...". This brings smiles, tears, and Nutella. So now that I'm officially back I'll be playing the backwards game while blogging the trip for those who so graciously supported us. And I'll try my best to meet each day, each "normal" task, just as my Guatemalan family does, with grace. Grace is the best word I can describe as I see in my mind the ladies walking back to their homes after the retreat. Nothing but grace. I will think about Azucena walking down her dusty road singing her song to the Lord. I will think about Carlitos and his mom walking him to a safe school for a kid with autism. I will think about the mom I didn't know I would need but God did so He gave me Carmen. I will think about her touching my face and calling me precious with a kiss on the forehead. I will think about riding the bus with my Cowboy and sharing an earbud :). I will think about turning around on the bus and watching my son being folded right into the teens and sweet Karen as they accepted him just as God created him. I will yell out "GUAT SIDE" and be ok with people thinking I'm crazy (it wouldn't be the first time). I will cry. I will laugh. I will praise the Lord for the love my family has for Guatemala. And I will trust Him to work more miracles if He wants us to return sooner than a year. On the outside I may seem the same. But on the inside I will once again be changed by the experience my Lord was so gracious to ask me to be a part of.
I will look forward to taking moments this week to go backwards to Guatemala. I won't expect it to be as amazing as being there. But I know I will be AMAZING and PRECIOUS". God already told me so. I'll share how as we go backwards together.
GUAT SIIIIIIIIIIDEEEEE!
